Lesson 1: Never discuss potential picks or rankings with someone in your league before your draft, unless the picks you are talking about are irrelevant. Irrelevant means that you have no interest in taking the player(s) being discussed. Furthermore, by discussing the player(s), it will not make a difference in your draft, your strategy or what your buddy knows about your strategy. Examples:
1. If you have the 12th pick in the draft, discussing your top 5 running backs is irrelevant and thus, is okay. If your buddy has a top 5 pick, it is your obligation to alter your rankings when telling him.
2. If you are not going to take any Browns’ players this year because they stink, then talking about them is okay. It is even okay to talk about their rankings, as long as you lie about them.
3. It is okay to talk about players you do not like and will not draft in any situation. You just cannot let your buddy know that you do not like them! Heck, you should even pump them up a bit and project how much better they will be than last year.
Lesson 2: Never discuss potential picks or rankings with someone in your league before your draft, unless you are “blowing smoke.” Blowing smoke is defined as talking nonsense and speaking mistruths about how you rank and what you think of a player. Downgrading the players you like and upgrading the players you don’t is blowing smoke. When talking to my FFL buds before draft day, I blow more smoke that Cheech and Chong and use more mirrors than Paris Hilton. Further advice:
1. Know when to Clam Up--The best advice is simply to “clam up” and not discuss anything with your buddies before draft day. If you are NOT a good liar, are NOT a convincing manipulative type or often get caught bluffing in poker… then keep your pie hole shut!
2. Understand the difference between Wisdom vs. Knowledge—Some FFL participants like to spout off their opinions and impart their knowledge onto others. These cats seem to feel a sense of “self worthiness” by doing so and genuinely like to boast. They like to listen to themselves talk. Please don’t be this guy! Being able to recite your top 25 running backs without reference is knowledge. Knowledge = “knowing stuff.”
Wisdom = “knowing stuff” + “clamming up”
Knowledge is the understanding that Matthew Hasselbeck is going to blow up this year. Wisdom is having the foresight to see this coming and to not tell anyone else.
Lesson 3: Things to say to your buddies and do before your draft:
1. “I think with everyone focused on stopping Steven Jackson and Donnie Avery this year, Bulger is going to have to use another target. Keenan Burton is a diamond in the rough. Bulger is going to bounce back and I think that Burton will be the guy this year.” Of course I am full of bologna….that is why I would say such a thing….it is pure fabricated BS.
2. “With Andre Johnson and Kevin Walter, Schaub is going to be a top 8 quarterback this year and may even sneak into the top 5.” Again I have no interest in taking Schaub and do not feel he will be in the top 10, so saying this is perfectly fine before draft day.
3. I will e-mail a buddy with four scrub receivers (all of whom I would not take in the draft) and ask him “to rank them because I want to have two of them on my team.” Again pure BS but it must be done.
4. Make up stories and share them. I will tell my buddy “I read today that Baltimore is going to start airing it out with Demetrius Williams and Mark Clayton. They said that with the departure of Mason they will be a faster team because he is old. I think he is right. Where do you have Flacco on your list because I am moving him up on my list.” Yes, I know, pure BS but worth it.
5. Ask a series of stupid questions about players I have no intention of taking….
”Do you think I can get Ochocinco in the 5th round?”
“Do you think it is a good pick for me to take Roy Williams in the 3rd round?”
“Where do you see Thomas Jones going this year?”
“You know who I think is going to break out is Cedric Benson, what do you think?”
“Why is everyone so down on Julius Jones, do you think he can get back to being significant?”
“Do you think that Willie McGahee will be there for me in the 7th round?”
“Where do you see Torry Holt going?”
6. Leave bogus rankings lying around the house or in the car when you know a fellow participant will be coming over.
Tod "FFLKING" Brooks
